Can two people really be meant to be? soul mates?
All this 'meant to be' stuff, why not believe it? Maybe it’s just up to us to make it happen, to show up and be that for each other.
Some things are going to work out as if they were destined to happen, as if they were just meant to be.

B.O.A. Ruxspin

It's one of those things where you get into a relationship and everything is perfect. You know that you're with the right person, 8 days seems like 8 wonderful years, and you know that everyone looks at you two as the "it couple".

This is exactly where I wanna be right now. 

Rest In Peace

I can't say I didn't see this coming. You were really sick for a long time. I really will miss you so, so much.

There was a long time in my life where all you were was just a face on Facebook. I didn't know who you were or what you were like.


When I finally met you, it was as if we had been life long friends. You were so cool with everything, as if you were a teenage girl in an older woman's body. I could talk to you for hours.

That was last Thanksgiving, we couldn't make it this year. You went into the hospital after Thanksgiving and then today we got the call that you had died.

I feel like crying every second of every hour. I didn't get to say goodbye, you were gone without a word. So again, someone has left me behind without any warning.

I love you Aunt Sandi. I already miss you.

embower, v.: I surround my heart with trees because I want that steady sense of life, the feeling of being hidden but still 
able to be found

B.O.A. Strokes

And the grass wasn’t green enough here
After watering it with my tears
I’m not sure where you went
Now we are just past tense
And the snakes, they are slithering in
Chasing me to my end
I can’t say where that is
I’m running again

And when I get there
It won’t be far enough
I’m a renegade
It’s in my blood
If ever I get there
It won’t be fast enough
I’m a renegade
I always was

Well, the spark never lit up a fire
Though I tried and tried and tried
The wind came through your lungs
A hurricane from your tongue
I’ll keep your secrets with me
Right behind my teeth
Your anger, your anchor
But I’ll sail much further on, ah, on

And when I get there
It won’t be far enough
I’m a renegade
It’s in my blood
If ever I get there
It won’t be fast enough
I’m a renegade
I always was

I’ll keep running
I’ll keep running again, keep running
I’ll keep running, running, running
Keep running, running, running

Oh, when I get there
It won’t be far enough
I’m a renegade
It’s in my blood
If ever I get there
It won’t be fast enough
I’m a renegade
It's in my blood

I’m a renegade
I always was

"Renegade" Paramore

Battles With Myself

Let's face it, you just got feelings for the one person that you promised you wouldn't feel anything for. 

He's your best friend, but he's amazing. 
He knows almost everything that you hide from most people, but I trust him.
This could ruin your friendship, but I can see it working for a really long time. 
What if you fuck it all up?
What if you disappear on him like you do with everyone else?

What if he leaves you just like... everyone else?

I'm not afraid.

What happened to not being ready for anything? What happened to wanting to stay single for a long time?
What happened to waiting?

Why wait? I'm way too young to stop my life just because my "big love" already happened and left me. I'm not even sure that "M" was my "big love". Maybe he was just someone that I had to love in order to figure out what love really is when I do find it. Maybe I was never in love before, I was just in love with the idea of it. I'm not saying this is love, I'm just saying... I feel different. He makes me happy and he makes me feel different. He's willing to wait for me and even when I feel like he's gonna be done with me, there he is... Waiting. I've never had that before and I may never find that. So here goes nothing, I just caught major feelings for my best friend and I told him. I hope this doesn't back fire.