I'm Still Here

"I'm still here, I'm still here, I'm still here"

I was bullied as a little kid. Many people made fun of me because of my uncontrollable curly hair and my missing two front teeth. People didn't know how I lost my teeth, they just knew that I looked like a weirdo. They didn't know that I bumped my mouth into a piano because my shoes were slippery when I was 3. I waited until I was 7 to get my teeth back. I didn't tell anyone that story because I was embarrassed. I was already seen as the girl with poodle hair. It got to the point where I thought about suicide for years, but I was too afraid to end everything. In the back of my mind, I believed that things would get better. I was right.

There was an assembly today, a man named Dr. Michael Fowlen came and spoke about bullying. He did impressions of these characters that appear one way and have a whole other side to them. At one point he began to act as a child with special needs.

I began to cry because I started thinking about my cousin, David. I thought about how kids might have treated David and what they must have called him. They may not have called him David, they might have just referred to him as "that kid with Cancer." David died before I was born and even though I never knew him, I still have those days where I sit in my room and cry because he is one person that I would give anything to meet. Let's face it, kids are ruthless, if they see someone who's different they will pick on them until something serious happens to that person. I can only hope the kids didn't hurt David in any way.

Despite everything that I have been through, I'm still here, walking tall. I'm not the quiet defenseless girl that I used to be, I have a voice, I am confident, and I am brave. I wake up in the morning and tell myself that I am beautiful and so what, I don't have a boyfriend, I will find someone who will love me for me and not for someone I try to be. So I want you to read this poem, it's called "I'm Still Here" by Langston Hughes:

Been scared and battered.
My hopes the wind done scattered.
Snow has friz me,Sun has baked me,

Looks like between 'em they done
Tried to make me

Stop laughin', stop lovin', stop livin'--
But I don't care!
I'm still here!

You are all beautiful, don't ever forget that.