I'm not gonna lie, I changed. The only reason I'm writing this blog right now is because I dropped some people and I never gave them a reason. So, I'm hoping that they randomly stumble across this and understand that it's too hard for me to tell them in person.
I figured this will help with your confusion. The last couple weeks you've been trying to ask me why I don't talk to you and I keep walking away. I'm trying to disappear and you're not letting me. So here's my explanation, now let me fade away:
I felt like our friendship didn't mean as much to you as it did to me. I felt used, like, I was the person you came to when you were fighting with your parents, girlfriend, friends, guardian, or when you needed food. I'm pretty good at listening and I always have food but when it came down to you demanding that I give you homework to copy just because you were too lazy to do it, that was it. I had it. Not only were you demanding it but I wasn't even in school that day so I didn't even know what the homework was.
You don't put effort into anything and then you complain when things don't go the way you wanted them to go. It's a problem. You complain when there are rules. You're never fucking happy. People are constantly worried about you and there's never a thank you or anything.
When you 'disappeared' for a couple days I was worried. Then out of the blue, here you are and you don't even acknowledge me. So I sat there in an office with our Economics teacher and fought back tears that were pointless. I shouldn't have been surprised. I was happy that you were okay but a "Hey, thanks for worrying" would have been nice. Once selfish, always selfish I guess.
So after graduation, we go our separate ways. I'll graduate from high school, go to college, and make a name for myself out there in the real world and you'll continue to skip school to stay in bed or smoke weed, barley graduate because you decided not to go to Economics (It's required to graduate, in case you didn't know), not go to college, and work three jobs all while living in La La Land. Simple.
I love you, you were one of my closest friends but I need to walk away. You make me make stupid decisions, I need to be friends with real life not all the alcohol I pour in my system. So I'm saying goodbye.
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I poured my heart into this one guys, I had a lot of feelings and I needed to let them out. Hopefully this will help anyone who may be in this same dilemma. See, I have a bad habit of bottling up things but I just needed to get this out there.
The quote is from a video game but I thought it was one of the best quotes I have heard in a long time and it kinda worked with this post.
Enjoy :)
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